So I tried this ten days of no judgment plan, and shared my goal with my partner. Laughing rang out, the disbelief that someone, even myself, could really subsist ten days without judgment. And he was right, I couldn’t last ten entire days without saying something about another person, whether a stranger or someone in my life, or even worse, go ten days without thinking something that could be considered judgmental!
It made me realize two things:
1) People, even when fighting against it, are judgmental. Being mean is not the goal, nor is thinking we are better than another. Wired into our dialogue, both internally and externally, is this negative and judging attitude. Not one person chastised me for saying something judgmental, I had to berate myself for negative thoughts.
2) This exercise made me see exactly how much I think negative thoughts about others, and myself, and how often I verbalize them! My partner started counting his remarks and thoughts as well, and it wasn’t pretty.
This experience could either make me feel ashamed and judge myself through my internal dialogue, or I can use it to hold myself accountable. It can instead encourage me to be nicer to myself and others, all of the time. I think the quote “Judge not, lest ye be judged.” applies here, and I am going to start viewing the world through rose-colored lenses that mar others’ imperfections as well as my own.
